Nedster's Film and TV Vat
Plunge, why don't you, into the misty, swirling waters of the Vat...
Oh, the X-Files. The X-Files. The X-Files. I'm overcome with love for the X-Files. Here are some links.
The Gossamer Fanfic Archive
The Ultimate X-Files Crossover Archive
Tiny Dancer's X-Files Episode Guide
What else? I think that's all there is to say. Oh, no! I'm wrong! Here are some of my favourite episodes, complete with title, weird number-thing, little descriptive bit, and thing to watch for. Some of them have been chosen simply for one scene that's so good I couldn't fail to include it.
|Jose Chung's 'From Outer Space'||3X20||Hilarious. But only for people like me.||Bizarre direction|
|Syzygy||3X13||Two hormone-crazed high-school girls kill everyone they hate. Like Carrie except far, far cooler.||The 'Hate him, hate him, wouldn't wanna date him' chant|
|The Host||2X02||Mutant worm-man kills people. With Darin Morgan in a worm-costume!||The freaky bit where the guy's brushing his teeth and spews up a worm|
|Post Modern Prometheus||5X01||Hilarious. But only for people like me. And filmed entirely in black and white. And with Cher.||Mulder and Scully dance at the end!|
|Blood||2X03||Unexplained freaky thing uses LED screens to take over people's minds.||The kooky final scene|
|Kill Switch||5X01||William Gibson wrote this one. Not very original, though. About a sentient computer. That kills people.||Punk Hacker Girl. The look for the millenium!|
|The Unlikely Suspects||5X01||It's got the Lone Gunmen in it! And they're cool!||Byers as a conformist!|
|Home||4X03||Crazy inbred people with shack full of deathtraps! A recipe for coolness.||Vomit-worthy deformations|
|Sanguinarium||4X06||Satan-worshipping plastic surgeon!||Serioulsy icky liposuction scene|
|Bad Blood||5X01||Hilarious, but only for people like me. And with vampires.||Impecccable self-parody|
|Musings of a Cigarette-Smoking Man||4X07||Hilarious, but only for people like me. And really touching. And stylishly apocryphal.||Cancer Man gets a life!|
|3||2X07||Lots of vampire serial-killers do scary things||Mulder gets laid!|
|Never Again||4X13||Crazy man gets told to kill by his own tattoo (voiced by Jodie Foster)||Scully gets laid!|
|D.P.O||3X03||Teenager has power to control electricity. And lightning. And stuff.||Shocking cow death.|
|War of the Coprophages||3X12||Mass hysteria about alien robot cockroaches.||Bambi...|
|The Field Where I Died||4X05||Suicide cults and past lives||The scene where Mulder walks through the bodies is indescribable|
|Small Potatoes||4X20||Shape-shifting rapist! With Darin Morgan in a shape shifiting rapist costume!||Mulder and Scully nearly kiss!|
Hooray! The 'cool episodes' thing for Buffy is finally here! Again with the episode title, a little summary-type-thing and then my favourite bit from the episode.
|Welcome To The Hellmouth||The very first episode.||We meet lots of the people we now know and love for the very first time|
|The Harvest||Buffy gets involved in her first real adventure.||"Day-light... isn't for another seven hours, you dolt!" swish swish swish schcrrplt!|
|The Pack||Very funny episode with evil hyena-spirits||Xander eats a live pig|
|I Robot - You Jane||Fantastic title, and Alyson Hannigan (Willow) gets a chance to shine.||Moloch in his robot body smashing his way through a wall|
|School Hard||Best 'feel-good' episode of Buffy, as well as the introduction of Spike, the coolest villain. In anything. Ever.||"Get the hell away from my daughter!"|
|Surprise||Buffy and Angel battle the Judge, a big killer smurf-thing.||Buffy and Angel get it on, with unpleasant consequences|
|Innocence||Angel turns evil and Buffy kills the Judge||"Cannot be killed with any weapon forged..." Yeah, right.|
|Passion||We see how evil Angelus really is||The end... so, so sad...|
|Becoming pt. 2||Angelus tries to suck the entire world into Hell||"You know... uh... 'get the hell away from my daughter!'" and also the climactic swordfight.|
|Faith, Hope And Trick||Faith and Trick arrive in Sunnydale.||Faith, we love you!|
|Homecoming||Buffy and Cordelia get hunted through the woods by lots of evil things.||Cordelia bluffing it with the remaining Gorch|
|Lover's Walk||Spike is back! Spike si back!||"Home... ugh... sweet... home..." thump!|
|Helpless||The Watcher's Council does an evil thing to Buffy||The Robert Harris-esque main vampire|
|Bad Girls||Buffy and Faith have fun.||Buffy and Faith dancing.|
|The Freshman||Buffy goes to College.||Sunday and her gang.|
|The Harsh Light Of Day||Spike comes back to Sunnydale.||Spike goes out with the ring.|
|The Initiative||Buffy finds out about the Initiative.||The massive underground James Bond-esque secret base.|
It's based on the 1992 film, which sucked beyond description, in case you didn't know. Don't get them confused. By the way, I have a signed photo of Sarah Michelle Gellar, by the way! Yes I do! Yes I do! And now for some links.
The Slayer Fanfic Archive
Domain of the Slain
Sonja Marie's BTVS Links
Dru and Spike's Domain
Shrine To Buffy
Yes. Here's a Star Trek section. I made it, and I'm proud. You may despise us. You may revile us. You may outcast us. But one day we will rule the world! Yes! Yes! WE WILL RULE ALL! Bwahahahaha!
The Star Trek Animated GIF Archive
The Borg Recruitment Center
The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition
My favourite film ever. The word innumerable comes a very small way to describing a tiny fraction of the amount of mediocre films there are. Then there are lots and lots of good films. And lots of great films. But the number of Great films is such that you could brutally cut all someone's fingers off, and then one would still almost be able to count them on one hand.
Edward Scissorhands is one such Great film. It's touching, and funny, and perfectly formed.
The two Batman films are great. (There are technically four Batman films, but the other two such frail imitations that if someone sneezed within four hundred miles of them they'd be ripped into their component atoms). Jack Nicholson rocks in Batman, and Danny DeVito rocks even more in Batman Returns. Everyone in the next two 'films' bites, largely because they're not directed by Tim Burton.
The next part of what is rapidly turning into a treatise on the music of Danny Elfman, who, in my opinion, was perfect for the Batman films and Edward Scissorhands, three fantastic gothic fairytales, but was an awful choice for To Die For, which is more of a blackly comedic urban myth. Which is very cool. And hilarious. And has the best credits sequence of any film. Ever. By far.
Hellraiser is great. Even if it's basically an incoherent series of images. I regularly use the phrase 'The boundaries between pleasure and pain are easily crossed' in conversation. It disconcerts some, but that's their problem.
The Alien franchise. Yay! I've not seen Aliens, Alien 3, and Alien Ressurection, so it's no longer so pathetic for me to read all the books and have all the merchandise. And Aliens and Alien Resurrection were really amazing, by the way. Borg Xenomorphs! They would rock! Yes! They would! Yes yes yes! And Tribble/Alien hybrids! Ooh baby! That's a thought, actually: now they're making Yoda Furbies, they could make Alien Furbies.
Bless my soul, what a great film The Game is. I've sent innumerable pretentious things about it to the Internet Movie Database. See it. Now. Now! Don't daudle! Don't read the next bit! Go and see it!
I hope that was enjoyable. The Vat awaits its next victim...